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Jolyon · Posted: Fri Jan 04, 2002 9:41 am

Hi everyone I am a newbie... there u go, I said it

I work in Southern Spain as a Graphic Designer, and I would love it if people would crit my work. I have just finished this as a precursor to a large advertising campaign for a telephone company here in the South of Spain

They wanted a young street image, and I hope thatï¿½s what I gave them. I just wanted to see what everyone else thought. I will be developing more characters in time. Donï¿½t know if you can see the logo that well, but if you could C&C that too thatï¿½d be cool. The logo stands for Mobnation, I tried to emphasise the M and the N in the logo squiggle. Tahnks everyone your help will be invaluable, and keep up the excelllllent work...

Awetopsy · Posted: Fri Jan 04, 2002 9:50 am

how young? I see a lady in her mid twenties in this pic. to make her look a bit younger, tone down the breast size a little. maybe make the head a bit bigger.

Conor O Kane · Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2002 5:26 am

Very nice work. The M logo is well designed. I agree that the girls head could be a little bigger.

mysketchbook · junior member Member # Joined: 14 Jun 2001 Posts: 8

give her shoulder length hair to give more character and pizaz. also for some better contrast make her clothing a different color than the background. and maybe make the phone a little bigger, or her whole arm bigger to give it more attention.

[ January 05, 2002: Message edited by: mysketchbook ]

tiktok · Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2002 11:56 pm

This is my first post here....I'm a newbie as well...

As for the image....it works well compositionally...but the black in the back ground seems too black...I tend to stay away from a "black black" in my palette as it draws your eye directly there. Perhaps a black outline around the girl with a slightly lighter toned neutral for the background would be more suited. Also...The hand holding the phone seems a little awkward. It doesn't quite feel as though its 'wrapping' around the phone quite correctly...like the fingers need to be lengthened or something.

otherwise...good job.

SWANY · Posted: Sun Jan 06, 2002 2:50 am

the style is really good, the clevage seems too high, maybee you could smudge them down a bit

I wish the chicks in OZ wore everyday street clothes like that, shes definetly european

AKIRA_x · Posted: Sun Jan 06, 2002 4:42 am

teens..atleast here in norway..are at the front of new mobilephone technology. The you used as a template is soon 4 years old...I think you should replace it either with 8310..or get pictures of the new 7650 that is due this summer..NOW THATS a kickass mobile phone!!

8310:

7650:

AKIRA

[ January 06, 2002: Message edited by: AKIRA_x ]

strata · Posted: Mon Jan 07, 2002 9:49 am

You wouldn't happen to think that logo is a wee bit identical to spunky's would you? =)
http://www.spunky.co.uk/

Awetopsy · Posted: Mon Jan 07, 2002 10:17 am

strata: no.... its similar but not identical.

Jolyon · Posted: Tue Jan 08, 2002 2:45 am

Sorry that my logo may look like sperm, but er... itï¿½s not

I donï¿½t steal things so I hope youï¿½re not implying that, anyway hope u like the rest of it!

laslauk · Posted: Wed Jan 09, 2002 12:20 am

The logo is cool. I like the idea that it is in her skirt too.